♥NDS,

Cute right? Hahaha.
*No captions*

So, this is what happened today. From start till finish. Haha.

Morning

I woke up at 0730am. Haha. Siang right? Cause you know why? Ful ask me to meet them at JC at 0830am. But since my mum is sending, i told them i meet them at CGH 7-11 at 0900am. Haha. Funny story. I left my place at 0845am right, i texted mat. Hoping to get a good answer from him, but, all hopes failed. Haha. He was waiting for ful and wan to get ready cause they just wake up. Nyahaha. So, i waited for them patiently at 7-11. Mat came first. Then we went to eat at somewhere i forgot the name. Then accompanied him to smoke. After that, went up to meet bf and his mother. Another funny thing happened. Haha. I saw bf right, then i pointed to mat la. Then i didn't saw his mother at the side of the bed. So, this mat go and ask bf super loudly, " Eh mak kau mane? " Not realising that she was there. Haha. When i pointed to mat that his mother was there, terus member minta maaf ngan mak dier. Hahaha. So funny. Left for awhile cause bf is being brought into the procedure room. We went down. Then met ful. Accompany him to eat. Haha. Then halfway through, wan and beel came. So me and mat watched them eat. Yeah. After that, they went to smoke. Then headed up to see bf again. Laughters here and there. Shortly after, mul came. Then yada-yada. You know la these people all. Haha. Bf was sent back home. Actually, he don't want to go home. But we all ask him to rest cause he still feels abit drowsy and we don't want anything to happen to him. Can see la the sadness in his face cause he cannot lepak with us. And furthermore, he don't want me to go home alone. Aww. So sweet :)

So anyways, after he left in the cab with his mum, beel, wan, ful, mul and myself went to smoke. I mean, them, not me. Haha. I good girl.

Afternoon

All of us went to kedai cina near eastview secondary cause mul wanted to wait for maziana. So yeah. Chit chatted. Talk about this talk about that. Laugh about this laugh about that. They got to know about my past. I got to know more about them. Haha. Then they did the usual la, kacau secondary school students all. Macam tak pernah kacau dorang dalam seumur hidup dorang kan. Haha. So anyways, when maziana came, mul sent her back home while the rest of us went to walk to tampines mall macdonalds to eat. Yeah. Then beel's friend came. Her name is nury nubel. Cool kan name dier? Haha. As soon as she came, all eyes on her. Lelaki all drooling or whatttt? Damn pretty i tell you. I wish to have her legs. Seriously, damn nice. Arghh! So anyways, before nury came, mul joined us back at macdonalds. Haha. Ok, so after that, beel and nury left us cause we were still eating and beel wanted to find for his brother a gift. So yeah. We took our own sweet time to eat. Then, mul ask me to gulung rokok. Haha. Aku ni, pandai gulung kalau takde dier nye dalam. Gulung cantik jeeee. Once the dalam, whatever you call that thing masok je. Habis ah. Hancur seh gulung aku. Haha.

I gave up twice. I ask ful to complete it. Frustrating seh. Haha. Met up back with beel and nury kat luar tampines mall together with hilmi. Kasut dier very cantik i tell you. Macam ice-cream. Haha. So anyways, after that, proceeded to a block near the mrt track. Lepak, talk, played taitee, bluff and some game beel invented. Haha. 6 plus off back.

Evening

Met up with my mum at tampines mall, again -____-" Followed her to get some stuff. Then off to century square to get more stuff. Then da habis, lepak under the block. Haha. Cause waited for my dad sekali. Yeah. Then she discussed with me about tomorrow. Haiyaa. Limit-limit, merangkak balik lor. Lol. Anywhos, met up with bf shortly after. Went to shop and save to get his youghurt then went to chill at the top of my block. Talk here and there and spent quality time together + playing his psp. Haha. Eleven we went off. Yupp.

So thats about it everybody. Haha. Now, i'm going off.

On a brighter note.
To wonderful bf.
See, i told you things will be fine. Things will turn out well. Now, one of your worries are lessen. Tomorrow is gonna be my turn. I'm not stressed over the results. I'm stressed cause i'm losing hair! Haha. Anywhats, i hope and pray, its gonna be a nothing to rather then its a something. And i hope that you can pick me up tomorrow. If not i'll roll to my death down the stairs. Chey, ok, fake seh. Haha. Anyways, I love you sugaaaa :) More then ever. More then anyone else. Hehe. Macam tak tau gitu eh. 4 more days baby. Lets make it through. &Dear, please pray for me alright. Mwahmwah!

&Oh! First time in my life, i lepak with beel, wan, ful, mat & mul without the presence of bf! Haha. They really take good care of me. Especially beel. Member punye precious thing, siapa tak nak jage ngan betol kan. Kalau tak habis ah kene ketok ngan bf. Lol. Ok da.

Goodbye/}

BENARKAH CINTA MEMBAWA BAHAGIA,
Ceriakan hidup insan.

Labels: tomorrow is my day.

Hello people. Yes, i'm back finally from somewhere. Haha. Well, that somewhere has been a nice experience. To catch some fresh air. To relieve stress. To connect with my inner self. &Yes. I did. Haha. My objectives of going there are met. Thou there are some family problems here and there. But i'm glad its all sorted out quickly and i had my peace and tranquility. Something which i've been longing to have since beginning of the year. So yeah, thank god i had it. Syukur.

I'm still waiting for a phone call from boyfriend. *Time check 0053* Sigh. See la. Come back here je, aku da stress. Haha.

Today, bf is going for a procedure. Then, aku pulak, tomorrow. Mak ai. Tak bagi chance seh. Haha. It still hurts every now and then. The whole day, i can predict it'll come and every two hours, last for a few hours or so, gone and back again. Wahh. I really cannot tahan and i really think there's something wrong with me. Fo' shizzle. Haha! Dope kepee. Ok merepek. Anyways, i really hope, its just a minor thing. And not a major thing. Its really been bugging me for the past few months. Last time, i could tahan, now, i can't even barely think of how excruciating the pain is. My god. Sigh. Well, lets just hope and pray for the best for the both of us. He wants to see me when he wakes up and i wanna see him too when i wake up. We fo sho don't want to leave each other. Not now, not so soon, maybe not ever :)
On a brighter note,
To wonderful bf.
I'll be praying that things will turn out right for you as well it will do for me. I know you're scared. I'm scared for you too. I'm not scared for me cause you're much more important to me. I'll be going there with ful, wan and mat ok. I'll see you there. I love you sugaaaar :) Don't leave me now. Don't lose hope on this. Don't give up faith.

Alright. I'm done. I think imma go off now.

Goodbye/}

AND I NEVER PLAN,
Growing old without you.

Labels: scares.

Ok people. Looks like i'll be going off earlier then expected. Earlier meaning 27++ minutes more later. Haha. Anywhos, don't think that i'm gone, i still don't know whats happening around here ah. Haha. Especially the girls, no touchy-touchy with my boify if not you get one slappy. Or maybe two. See hows my mood :)

On a brighter note.
To my wonderful bf.
Have a happy time when i'm not here to scream at you for your ciggies intake, late coming home and whatever more nonsense you can think off just to piss me off cause you think i look cute when i angry. -___-" Haha. And you know eh what pisses me off, what i like and what i don't like. Don't act like one superhero if you don't have to ok! Heh heh. Take care of yourself. And i bet you're still sleeping now. Tskk. I'm going off and you're sleeping. How could you!
Ps; Thank you very much for meeting me yesterday. I had fun. You had fun. We had fun. &Thanks for the long phone call too. I had fun spewing out nonsense to you and you had fun irritating me. Haha.
I love you sugaaa. You're such a joy :)
Mwahmwah!

Ok now people. I have to do some last minute packing. I'll be back soon. Shan't say when. Later you all know when to stop menggatal with my bf. Haha. Till then.

Oh! Before i forget. Never hear from one side of the story especially if that someone is like so berbual world please. I don't like, people say i do things that i never do. I get very angry. Seriously. So, to the people who belong in CGH team __, get to know me first before you say things about me ok? Thank you very much. I'll really appreciate that alot :)

Goodbye/}

HOW LONG WILL I BE WAITING,
To be with you again.

Labels: away for the time being.

Life is full of magical spells that is either casted upon or bestowed.
Life was never easy for fellow human beings.
Then why is there life?

Good morning people. As you must know, i didn't have a good nights sleep yesterday. Because of one thousand and one reasons. Yeah. Now, my head hurts like anything. Arghh. What else is new diyy? Haha. Lamemofo.

I've been thinking, why have i changed this past few months. Maybe to me, the reason was, i lack of ___(whatever this is i really don't know)___. Here are the few possibilities that i could think of:

Hope & faith | I've been giving up too easily. Giving up too easily can cause a drastic change in life right?
Love | Well, not so la. Maybe from my parents. Yeah. Cause these past few months, i've not been receiving any. And i doubt i will receive any. Cause i'm all grown up. Which is selfish cause then, i'll be expecting more from bf and that will increase the stress for him.
Confidence | Haha. I chickened out way too easily cause i'm scared about one thousand and one things. I have no idea why i've been this scared in my life. But i am now.
Immune system | Haha! Yes. I think this is the answer. I despardo-ly need some healthy blood to go in my body and help repair my immune system please. It sucks to feel how i'm feeling now. Heh heh. Please?

So i think thats about it. Yeah. See, there are four possible answers, so i don't know which one is which. Maybe all, maybe one, maybe two, three and then again, maybe all. Haha. So yeah. I'll get back to you all again about what exactly is happening. Since i myself don't know. Its not that i don't know, i just don't know. Ok, get it? Yes? No? Me too. HAHA! :)

&People, please, try not to put your wondering nose in other people's problems. Sick and tired of you people poking into other people's problems and in the end its not your problem turns out to be your problem. I'm saying as a whole. Not directed to only A PERSON. Please read this carefully. Alot of people know. So i'll be glad if you just shut the hell up. Yeah. That'll be great. And don't become some superstar try to find fault with anyone. Like i said, its not your problem don't make it your problem. Ok people? Thank you. Appreciate that so much.

On a special note.
To my wonderful bf.
I'm not mad at you for yesterday. I was never mad at you the whole time. I didn't know you were that stressed. I forgive you. And i'm sorry for asking that particular question. Cause thats the only question that pops out in my head when i hear a name that i don't want to hear from now on. Yeah. Cause like i said, i'll do anything to make you happy, to make him happy, to make them happy. I don't want, to be any cause of whatever nonsense that can possibly pop up anymore. I've had enough. I've had enough of being the center person who is always at fault. In the end, i get stressed, you get stressed, we fight, we break. What for? For some problem that it wasn't supposed to be other people's problem and now its becoming their problem and because of them we fight? Not worth it. I'll rather we fight about us then fight about other people. So, i know where i've gone wrong. And i know what to do now. I won't again ask those types of questions. But please, don't make me think that way also. Cause it sucks to think that way. Really it is. I've been up the whole night crying on just because of that stupid question that has been stuck in my head for the past six months. I don't dare to ask cause i know this might happen. So anyway, on a brighter note, i love you too dear. &You know nothing can change that. For now, relax yourself. Don't be too tensed. The more you stress up, the more your health plunges. The more it'll affect the people you love especially your mum. Ok dear? &I really really a hundred times really hope i can meet you today. Ilysm syg. Always and have been. :)

I'm glad thats done and thats out from my chest. Now it feels so much lighter and easier to breathe. Rather then just now so tight macam nak mati. Haha. I'll be going out soon. To my aunts place to do some spring/winter/autumn/summer cleaning. Haha. At night, hopefully i can get to meet him. Thats my last wish. Cause i'll be off tomorrow afternoon. So yeah.

Dear god, please make my last wish come true. Sekejap pun takpela. Asalkan jumpa je. Please?
Thats all for now. Take care.

WHEN YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYES,
And tell me that you love me.

Labels: ups and downs.

Thank you for all the moments spent together.

I'm not gonna talk about how we were or everything. Most of it is already said in both your blogs. I admit i was abit unglam, giving you guys the cold shoulder. But that's just how i am. I can't change it. Anyways, i know you guys will be fine without me. Everything will still go as smooth like before. I know you guys will be fine :) We will bump into each other in school when 2.2 starts. But thats ok, like what kim says, it'll pass by fast. And i'm out of both of your lives for good. So, all the best in whatever you do. In your future. Kim, i hope you get into the uni you wanted. I know you can do it. Sakinah, don't give up too easily and don't be too stressed out in things which are not too important for you right now. You know what are you're priorities and you know whats aren't. Be strong when it comes to boys & your friends ok?

Thats all i've got to say. Both of you, take care of yourself too ok? Be strong in everything. And please study hard for your 2.2.
" Time will heal these wounds, but it'll never heal back our friendship. "
Kim, i still love you. You know that.
Kinah, i do love you too.
But everything said and done. Nothing now can rewrite back history.
Goodbye, friends.

Another failed attempt to meet my needs today. Haha. Whatever. I'm leaving on friday. To somewhere only i know. I need time on my own. Like funny huh i leaving bf alone here. Haha. People need breaks from each other to get better. Well, some will get better some won't. So anyways, tomorrow will be my last day here. Then i'll be off. Anyways, ry said this in her blog.

to diyy a.k.a my photogenic friend:
i'm really sorry for whatever happened between us lately. there's really a big gap between us. i just don't want to lose you as a friend. u're really a great bestfriend to me. being there for me when i need you to, scolding me when i'm in the wrong like you're my big sister & not forgetting, make me realise things. hoping that we could be like before. all those secrets we shared & those nonsense we're up to. i really don't want it to go away just like that. i really miss you & the old times.

anyway. thanks for everything dear. last long with him. (:
_______________________________________________________________

I don't know whats wrong with me. I miss the old me. I miss being patient, i miss being not so sensitive. I miss not being so hot tempered. Why, why do i have to change? Why do i have to be this dark person? Why do i, of all things, have to be in this manner? Sigh. Maybe its fated. Maybe i am gonna live a miserable life. Arghh. I hate how my life is turning. But i have to love it.

Thats all for today.

Labels: And its all said and done.

Maybe we're trying,
Trying too hard.

Hello :)
Currently: In my mum's car otw to ttsh while updating via her laptop. Haha.
I'm so bored. Bf's prepaid is low. Arghh. Even more boring. I can't seem to verbalize with him till late in the night after 8. So i'll have to live in doom for the next don't know how many hours cause i lazy to count. Haha. You know, yesterday night i had a fun time talking to him on the phone. Haha. Irritated him with the song " halo ". And he couldn't stop saying the word halo. Haha. So cute, yet so funny, yet almost irritated me. Haha. Still, he's my sugaaar :)
He's now at tampines polyclinic accompanying his brother. Tskk. He had pancakes for breakfast and he didn't leave me some. I'm so sad. I want pancakes too but then breakfast dah habis. Haha. Tunggu je la besok-besok ke hape ke. Lol.

I asked alysha to text me yesterday right? Haha. She did know. Then we texted for awhile. Then i never reply back. Haha. Then she got worried all. Haha. So cute. I love her la. Heh heh. Yeah. The girl who thinks i'm pretty all padehal tak. I'm super ugly ok :D

I don't know what to do. Oh. I'm reaching already. Haha. Should i stay in the car or follow? I think i shall follow lah. Good girl kan. Haha. Padehal just take blood, check vital signs then can go off. Less then 15 minutes can already. Tskk. Oh-oh, mum is out of the car, she's opening the back seat door now. She's screaming at me to get off the lappy. Hahahaha. Why am i even typing this? Tskk. She ask me to wait in the car! Hooray! Haha. Grandfather is out from the car and on the wheelchair. And now they are going to the place. They're in the place and i can't see them already -_____-" Haha. So, what should i do now? AHH! I want to play don't forget the lyrics. Then maybe, just maybe, i'll find a new blogskin. Hahaha. Since last time eh? I know. Shut up :)

I'll edit this post if there is a need too. Haha. &Oh, i'll never regret my decisions on anything i made. Cause from what i see, its the best for me. Sorry if i have dissapointed alot of people. But this is life, its not fair. It was never a happy one. Till then.

Alysha still thinks that boyfriend wears skinny jeans. Haha! So adorable kan she? And she updated her blog just for me. Aww. So sweet. Hehe. Ilysm :)
One day we go watch movie together ok? Kalau bf kasi. Heh heh heh. And today is your lucky day ok i never annoy you like anything. I very good know. So must thank me. Haha. I didn't suck your blood for once. And please, i tak suke kalau you kate i lawar. Pasal i tau i tak. EEEE! Haha. Menyampah :D You the pretty one. And for gods sake i'm not even fairrrr -_______-"

♥ Kim says:
I still do.
ツ Diyy anaa. says:
we'll never be like last time. not after what we've been through.
♥ Kim said (11:29 PM):
but I'll love you always and forever
ツ Diyy anaa. says:
thank you for this moment.
i just can't seem to get over the feeling. i'm sorry.
♥ Kim says:
I'm still very mad, so much so I didnt want to have anything to do with you.
but time do the healing
For now, a pity we had to end our friendship
really, take care of yourself.
ツ Diyy anaa. says:
i still love you kim. but not like before.
again i'm sorry it has to end this way.
maybe its best for me.
i will.
♥ Kim says:
yeah maybe.
ツ Diyy anaa. says:
you take care too.
♥ Kim says:
I will.

Its a pity things have to turn out this way. Like i said, maybe its for the best. I still love you kim. But not like before. Now after what we have been through. Time will heal these wounds. But it'll never heal back our friendship. I'm sorry it had to turn out this way. Love.

Goodbye/}

I FEEL THE ADRENALINE MOVING THROUGH MY VEINS
Spotlight on me and i'm ready to break.

Labels: goodbye.

Let the rain fall down,
I'm coming clean.

Hello. Things aren't just turning out well for me. Yeah. Oh well, gods punishment/gods grace? Whichever. I'm just glad its happening to me rather then my loved ones. Yeah. Anyways, i made a new friend yesterday, her name is hidayu :) Yes, the girl who apparantly called hazmi mayanmar boy. Haha. So cute. Anyway ayu, its nice knowing you. And i hope you had a fun date with that someone. Haha. Again, your hair is much more nicer. As it is now. Don't cut!

I'm not gonna say whats the results of my MRI. Only bf knows. I'll like it to stay that way. Yeah.
" Don't act like you care. Cause you don't.
Its over. Still its like this "

I've lost this two. So who else is going?
I don't care anymore. So yeah. I'm gonna live my life as it is. I'm not gonna waste my time nor bother on stupid hopes that it'll be like it was before. I'm better off, like i said before :)

Oh. Yesterday, iqah ajak soffi down to lepak with us. Haha. She's funny. She's fun. Yeah. Then two of her other friends came. One of them stay opposite my block. I've seen her a couple of times. Haha. I met bf also yesterday. Then we sent iqah to tampines interchange then headed off to my block. We slacked till almost eleven? Haha. Then i had to go off cause mum will be screaming in my ears if i came home late cause she wasn't home and there is only my cousins and friends. So yeah, can get the picture? Don't? Nevermind :) It doesn't matter to you anyway. Haha. So, i texted bf till i fell asleep. Omg. It hurts like hell. Seriously. I just wish i could take it out and there will be no more pain. Arghh. punishment/grace? No idea still. -___-"

Anyways, today, i'm gonna pick up bf from mosque later on. Haha. Then buy food from mac donalds and eat under the block macam biasa. Lol.
" Everywhere i'm looking now,
I'm surrounded by your embrace,
Baby i can see your halo,
You know you're my saving grace,
You're everything i need and more,
Its written all over your face,
Baby i can feel your halo,
Pray that it won't fade away. "
Know the song? Don't know? Find out yourself uh. Think what? I'm your walking music library is it? Heh heh.
I love you baby :)

Alysha, text me when you see this in your screen. Infront of your eyes. Haha.
The rest, don't bother to text. Cause you don't care. &Don't act like you do. Ok?

&Oh, great game from liverpool. 5-0 or whuttt. Haha. See, i told you we'll be catching up.
You'll never walk alone!

Goodbye/}

MAKE YOU COME ALIVE,
I can take you higher.

Labels: halo

God's most beautiful creation on earth,
Babies :)

I can't sleep. I'm wide awake. I'm scared. I'm praying. I'm going back to tampines home now. Hoping to catch a wink of sleep or maybe more. I'll be out by nine to RH. I hope, things will be great. Be back by one or two to update. Or maybe longer.

" I hope to have babies some day. Even if its my last wish "

To bf: Don't worry so much. I'm sure i'll be fine. I love you baby. You should know that.

Labels: hope and faith.

" Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger cause enmity and enmity may result in seperation "
Source: mai's blog :)

Alright. Today is the last day of attachment. Yes. Finally. Haha. I can have my beauty sleep after so long for three weeks. I can have peace and tranquility before i go back to hell once again. Whats new? Lol. Anyways, updates on yesterday and today are the same. Overall, morning shift time flies by very fast. Yes. Eventhough we don't have much patients to bring shower ( thank god ) but the sponging and changing is taking up alot of time due to our patients being unable to walk to the toilet or bathe themselves. Yeah. Haha. So thats why time flies by very fast. Hopefully, this will continue when we come back again. I don't want to stand like one stone do nothing cause why? " You guys are already year two students. Graduating soon. You can never have nothing to do. Better find something to do or else. " Yes. Or else part scares cause they can do anything to us since its our final year. I told myself, i need good GPA. Hopefully, i will. * silent prayers *

Something happened to me just now. My hand got almost scalded. Haha. I was doing sponging with my patient and this SN. Then suddenly the patient spilled hot water on my hand. I wanted to scream and curse but then i remembered he's a confused patient so i don't blame him for the whole incident. It was partly my fault as well cause i didn't inspect the surrounding for any harmful objects. Seriosuly know, the hand damn fast. Once i untie the restrainer, PAP! Hot water splashes onto my hand. It was damn hot and my hand like freaking red i tell you. I didn't ice it cause it will make things worst so i told the sister and she applied cream onto my hand. Luckily i act fast, if not my hand cacat. I don't like :( Nomore beautiful hands. Haha. Anyway, i hope this will be the first and the last these kind of things happen. I don't want to kena again.
Pain know. Have pity on me la. I still young. I appreciate what god has given me. Don't take it away from me ah. Sigh.

Anyways, its already 1729. I'm supposed to be asleep but instead i sewed my pants cause it was torn and it took me an hour or so. Now, want to sleep also no point. So i'll sleep in the bus later on when i pick up bf from work. Yeah. I am picking him up thou i'm tired and i am running a slight fever. Shh. Don't tell him. Later he don't allow me to pick him up. Haha. Its been awhile since i last saw him. Chey! Padehal baru semalam seh jumpe. Haha. " Good job! " Heh heh heh! Semakin hari semakin bagus la yeeee :)

I miss people. Yes, i haven't contacted alot of people recently. Due to tiredness. Goshh. Sorry.

Alysha Abdul Malik.
Atiqah Ismail.
Sahida Supati.
Jocelyn Lew.
Sakinah Jaffar.
Kimberly Chander.
Durriah Mohd Sidek.
Faridah Azman.

Ok. I'm done. I want to find new blogskin now. Haha. I hope, i can do it and find it and complete it before 7pm. Lalalala ~

Goodbye/}

CAUSE MY LIFE WOULD JUST SUCK,
Without you.

Labels: ended.

Cause i know you'll be there,
When no one else would.
Cause i know you'll be there,
When i need you.

I'll make this a quickie. Since people are pastering me to update. Haha. Faithful readers. How can i ever thank you. Anyways..

Monday

First day at ward 42. Super cool ward i tell you. Its small and cosy and all the staff are nice. I like working there. Like fun gitu. We make friends easier. Haha.
Ended at four. Bf came and picked me up. Off back home.

Tuesday

Headed back to school for simulation training. My team, SGH 3, was combined with TTSH 4 and SGH 2. Kecoh or whattt everyone. Haha. Ain ah. Bising! Lol. We really made the sim lessons lively, laughters and shouting here and there. Macam fun seh. Really. Lol.
I wasn't called to do role playing cause all the questions teacher throw at me i can answer. Heh heh. Thank god eh. Lol. Anyways, after that, met bf at simei. Then headed back home.

Today

Afternoon shift. Ahh, macam biasa juga. Very fun to work at ward 42. Haha. If can, i want all my posting to be at ward 42. All the staff all gerek. Can easily make friends with. Can approach without being scared. Haha. Cool uh. I like. I managed to do two skills. Yes. Haha. I'm starting early on my skills. Don't want to kelam-kabut. Waiting for someone who needs I/V. Teros buat skill ah. Thats like the most critical skill seh. Haha.
I'm aiming to do nebulizer tomorrow. Yes yes. Huhu.
Get all my initials done. Insulin and hypocount can get competency tomorrow juga. Yeah. Cool or whatttt. Dah two skills complete. Tak payah terkial-kial. Haha.
Ok. Aims to do for tomorrow:

Nebulizar.
Insulin & hypocount competency.
Calculate infusion rate.
Off plug.

If i can achieve this 4 by tomorrow. ALHAMDULILAH :)
Haha. Ok, back to just now. I was so pissed off cause my stomach was in pain. Then this two bloody matreps have no life. Want to make people angry. Want to make people scold vulgarities. Like f_ck. Seriously. I'm damn bloody pissed off with them. If tomorrow they have, i'll make sure, i'll ask the doctor to cut their balls and feed to the piranas. Damn bloody irritating know. Pasal dorang, habis ah kite. Hais.
Ya allah, make them go away :(

Still waiting to call bf. Morning seh besok.

Goodbye/}

WHERE WERE YOU,
When i was alright?

Labels: irritating specimen, ward 42

Even the best fall down sometimes,
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme.

I just got back from mustaffa center and suntec city. Man, was there so many people at mustaffa center. Haha. Anyways. Here are the updates.

Suntec city

We went to this starhub thingy at the convention center cause dad wanted to upgrade plan then can get free laptop but then all the laptop finish already and only left samsung lcd tv. Haha. Dad was like " want to take the tv or don't want? " Then i say ah " at home got so many tv still want some more tv for whatttttt? " Then yeah. Didn't get the tv. So we headed back to capitol where we park the car. Then headed off to mustaffa center. Haha.
&I had to squat down everytime when they're not walking cause my stomach sakit habis. Macam nak beranak pun ada macam nak stomach flu pun ade macam gastric pun ada macam gugut pun ada macam sakit giler ______ pun ada. HAHA.
Macam-macam ah kau diyy. Tskk.

Mustaffa center

People there all want to die early tau. I simply just cannot understand why they like to jay walk. They think damn fun is it to jay walk all? Tskk. My dad also knock down this guy. Haha. So funny i tell you they're facial expressions. Tskk. After going one full round, got a parking space. Straight away go inside mustaffa center to get our stuff. Then headed out and makan.
AKU KEPINGIN NAK MAKAN THOSAI MASALA.
And i got it :D Haha. SEDAP OI!
Nak makan lagi.
You, besok gi serangoon road makan thosai ok ok ok? Best! Hehe.
After makan, headed off back home.
_____________________________________________________________________

And so, here i am now. Back at home.
Chatting with bf and alysha. Haha.
Oh you know what?
LIVERPOOL SO KICK MAN U'S ASS!
HAHA!
LOSE 4-1 KEPEEEEE!
PADAN MUKA!
HAHAHAHA!
MAN U IS THE BEST TEAM,
BUT LIVERPOOL IS THE BETTER TEAM.
So what if you still lead by four points?
We'll catch up. Not to worry :)
Haha. I still can't get over it. Man u lost. AT HOME SOME MORE. Hahahah.
Don't blame vidic alone. Blame on your defenders. Blame on your bad game tactics.
Liverpool deserve to win. Ahhh, for once i can feel proud for my team.
( Cause this is the only match i watch until full. HAHA! Lain match, takde time ok )

&I'm done.
Haha.

Goodbye/}

YOU MAKE IT EASIER,
When life gets hard.

Labels: lucky.

Hello readers. Haha. Ok. So, the pit was fun :) Yeah. I do not regret going at all. Seriously, it was super hallarious. Haha. Its not an everyday kinda thing where you can meet and spent the day/night with this kind of people. Lol. So anyway, here goes the updates.

Yesterday

I met bf and ray under his block. Then we headed off to another block to meet saiful and safwan. Bf went to buy minyak then saiful ask him to buy coke. Haha. THE FUNNY THING IS, he didn't say in a can or in a bottle. SO, bf went to buy the one in the can. Haha. THEN, when he came back everyone started laughing. Haha. Then ful went to explain he wanted the bottle and not the can. Cause it was for everyone. Lol. So, bf went to change it then yeah. Initial plan was to take cab to the area but then the taxi drivers now a days damn scared to bring five people. Haha. So, bf, ray and myself went to take a cab down since bf has to carry the rice and ray carrying the chicken. Ful and wan went to take the bus. As soon as we reached the place, beel, jebat, mul, maziana and alip was there. So yeah. Help here help there. Help to makan lah. HEH. Ok, merepek.

Then mat and sheeqeen came. Haha. Happy belated birthday to the both of you! :)
Talk, talk, talk. Laugh, laugh. Lol. Then suddenly, i became the chef ( as said by sheeqeen ) Hahaha. Bf was my right hand, beel was my left hand. Lol. My two helpers. Wan, mat, mul tolong kipas. Haha. Kan best ade orang tolong. Then slowly, the rest started to come. Yeah. So, helped them cook. Cook, cook, eat, cook, cook, eat, cook, cook, cook, cook, eat, cook, cook. HAHA. That is my kerja there from start till finish. Then took a break. Went to watch the guys play pool. Then some more people came. Then, part two started. HAHA!

The guys, except bf, alip, ray, mat and mul started to drink. Yeah. Mul and maziana went to the movies halfway. Haha. So yeah, beel, ful, wan, elmmy & bal ( i think that is his name. can't remember. HAHA ) drank for the first round.

Yeah. Haha. As you can see in the photo. Shirtless step fierce guy is beel. HAHA. The guy seating on his beside is bal. The guy in white is safwan. The peace guy is ray and lastly elmmy. Ray tangkap glamour je kat situ. Haha. Ful was already tipsy by then :) So he cannot take photo. Haha. Then, as soon as they finish the jim beam bottle, this is what happens:

THEN AGAIN, PLEASE BE REMINDED, ray doesn't drink. He feeling-feeling drunk only. Like i said, tangkap glamour. Haha :) So yeah. Ful was damn tipsy. Beel was gone. Elmmy was tipsy too, bal and wan was alright. Haha. So yeah.
Me and bf had nothing better to do while they we're drinking. So he played psp and i did this,

&You know what happens when people get drunk. Heh. Bf, ray, alip and myself became baby sitters. Sam also. But she halfway angkat laughing gas. And the drunkards also tangkap laughing gas. Haha. So, you know what laughing gas do. No need for me to elaborate. Heh. Soon after, second round of drinking for them. Bf and myself already in the tent. Lying down. HAHA :)

Today

I swear i couldn't sleep. My sides were in pain. Haha. I think my kidney ah. And it was super cold. I don't know how bf can manage to sleep without his t-shirt on. Da la semalam satu-satu memekak. Jiwang plus this and that la. Haha. Then, when i woke up cause i badly had to go to the toilet, i saw fehrin lying outside our tent with tissues on his hand and nose. Haha. Drunkards. Tskk. So yeah. My stomach was in bad pain. I think it was gastric. It had to be gastric. I don't want it to be anything else. Haha. Then, did a little bit of cleaning up. Talk to jebat, mat & sheeqeen then blahblahblah. They had photo taking session -___-" Haha. Bf tak habis-habis dengan dier punya techtonics. But cute. Haha.
After that, people left then waited for them to wash up. Punya lah cepat dorang mandi. Tskk. Then off to downtown macs to have breakfast. Along the way, there are alot of funny moments cause fehrin was still abit tipsy. Haha. And as soon as we settled down and nak makan, this is what happen to fehrin.

Yes, haha. He slept. We were laughing like mad cause they keep on disturbing him. Haha. Soon after, all of us went back home. Bf and myself went to lepak for awhile then we went back home. I bathed and i slept till six plus. Omg. Haha. Then showered again. Then prayed. Watched abit of tv. Then started with my editing of pictures ( if you see some photos tak senonoh editnye, means i already malas at that point of time. HAHA ) Then text with bf. Watching the manchester united and liverpool match now. Currently liverpool is LEADING. Biasa juga! Haha. Ok. Gonna go eat now while waiting for windows live hotmail to load my application while texting bf also.

Goodbye/}

ALL I EVER NEED IN LIFE,
Is you by my side to make me feel complete.

Labels: liverpool., pit

I'm drifting apart,
Where were you when i needed you?

Hello. Haha. Yes, its so rare of me to blog earlier in the morning. But i felt like i kinda have to. So yeah. I have something to say;
" I miss you "
People say they miss me, but... Oh wells.
Haha. I don't want to start. I'm tired of all these. Its better if we're left drifting apart. So yeah. Enough about that.
I finally caught up with alysha insyirah. Haha. Its been donkey months since i had a proper chat with her. " You and your damn schedule " Haha. Yes, my damn schedule. Sorry la.
Today is her last day of school and then its her one week break. But come back to school only is her CA's right? Haha. So poor thing. Biology and chemistry some more. Ahh, so much for holidays. Haha. As for me, i can't wait to start work. Get it over and done with for that one week and have a proper break. I really need it. To catch up on my sleep and to catch up on my inner self.

"Sometimes, i really wish i could tell you how i feel. But i've told too much. Too much for you to handle. Too much for you to not know what to do or actually know how i feel. I want to let you go, but there's this thing in me that is forcing myself to not do so. Cause why? I'm scared. Scared of all the possiblities that might happen. Scared that of all things, you'll make the same mistake again. I trust you. Its not that i don't. For once, actually feel what i feel. I can't let you feel how i feel cause i'm blowing them away for my own class chalet. I'm giving you the benefit that i'm gonna be safe at home and nobody's gonna disturb me or what so ever. But, can you just for once feel how i feel. Like i said, its not that i don't trust you. Opportunities are out there. Possibilities is everywhere. You just might not know it. And what have i got to loose if i don't go? Everything that i build up for. I'm not gonna sacrifise all that. So please, just help me this once. Just feel what i feel."

Glad thats off my chest. Haha. So now, i think i'm gonna go do something. Whatever that something is, to keep me of thinking. I'll edit this post later if i have to or want to.

*Edited.
I'll be off to the fcukers pit later with bf and saiful. So i won't be blogging till tomorrow i think. Yeah. I just hope, the decision made will not make things turn out ugly. Updates soon. Take care lovelies.

Goodbye/}

IT DOESN'T MATTER ANYWAY,
Words can never make me stay.

Labels: fallen again

If we need to make the change,
Then why aren't we changing?

Hello lovely humans. I've just gotten back from tampines mall. With my mum. Haha. You know, today's day aint that bad afterall. Let me tell you why. Haha.
Firstly, i waited for bf's text. Haha. He texted me so late. I tell you luckily i didn't have to rush to change and get ready cause i was already aiming to go to a place. Haha. Then, i met him at 403 to accompany him to CGH for his appointment. Surprisingly, the waiting time at CGH is fast. *claps* Haha.
After the appointment & the counselling, headed to east point bk to have our lunch. Yeah.

Then after that, initial plan was to head to my place. Took the train down to bedok. Haha. But then, plans change, so we headed back to tampines. Then sat at my second place for awhile then he went home. Haha. As soon as i reach home, mum wants me to accompany her to toys r us at tampines mall. Got for my baby cousin her birthday gift and left for home. Yeah. Thats about it actually. Haha.

Yes, if you go to maisarah's blog. We're using the same skin. But i just feel a need to change my old skin. I don't know why. But i'm settling with this skin first. I'll change it when i feel like it ok?

Now, i'm gonna search for a new skin for bf's blog. Haha. Till then.
To go or not to go, that is the question.

To sakinah & kimberly;
I just need time off. I'm not leaving the both of you. I just need time off to clear my mind. I'm sorry for everything. Love.

Goodbye/}

WHY IS IT SO DAMN DIFFICULT,
To have what we want in life?

Tell me if time should make a change,
Then why do i feel the same?

Both of you will do fine, WITHOUT me.
I know it.

Hello people. I've been not myself lately. Well, mostly around friends. Around boyfriend i don't know why i'm perfectly fine. Haha. So, lets get things started shall we?

School

School's over for us. Yes :) Haha. Well, i guess it should be that way shouldn't it? Ok crap. We're starting work next week, for a week. Then term break and then continue working again. Arghh. So frustrating. Haha. I already got my schedule for next week.
Monday: 8 to 4.
Tuesday: Have to go back to school for simulation training. NO WORK! YAY! :)
Wednesday: 1 to 9.
Thursday: 7 to 3.
Friday: 7 to 3.
Arghh! Nightmare! Haha. &I'm not in the same group as anisa again. Walauwei. Its been since 1.2 we've been not in the same group. WHAT IS THIS?! Haha. BUT! We're lucky to get miss rahimah as our clinical instructer and my group is as the same as before just that we have a new member now name gina :)
Haha. Ok.
EXAMS IS OVER. YAY. Haha. You know i have something to say.
PCA PAPER, YOU BETTER GET ME A B OR ATLEAST A C. IF NOT. I'LL BE DEAD MEAT.
I was quite dissapointed that whatever i have studied didn't come out for SAQ. Hais. But its over.
Biology paper was easy :)))
Ok. Thats it for school.

Friends

Well, i've been avoiding them much really. Haha. Cause i don't want things to get more worst then its already is. But, i'll like to be informed too you know. Hahaha.
Anyways, i'm not gonna blabber on my friends. Cause i don't want to get upset for nothing uh. Like, don't want to include me. Fine. Sure :)
SBY? Its starting to look more like SB.
Its ok. Don't care about my feelings for now. Haha. I just want to be alone.
Don't bother asking how am i or whatsoever. You've done enough.

Relationship

Boyfriend has been a really big part in my life. And i really thank him for that. He has been there for me when friends aren't. When family members aren't. When things aren't right, he's just there to make me feel better. How could i possibly get another person like him? Haha.
Love makes the world go round :)
11th here we come. Hee.

Other

I've finally watched yes man. Haha! I think its a really nice show. I should start being like jim carrey. Say yes to everything if only i mean it. Haha. Not that i haven't been doing that but i realise i've been saying alot of " NO " lately. I have no idea why, but yeah. I should start saying " YES " instead of " NO ". Haha. How? I don't know la. Or maybe the word " MAYBE ". Ok. Enough about this.
I'm currently watching powerpuff girls. I just ate rice with daging and curry. Hahaha. And i'm done.
Oh, i'm running a fever again. Arghh.
And my back is aching and i'm having chest pains and my lower abdomen hurts everytime after i pee. How like that?
Thats it ah diyana. You're going soon.
HAHA!
(sometimes i wish it was true. but i don't want to leave boyfriend behind. i just want to run away from whatever i am facing now)

Goodbye/}

YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE,
So make the best of it.

Labels: friends, life.

♥, mine to hold.

Hello everyone. Its a sunday today and i just got back from the doctors and and and and and guess what? fourty degress sehh :D Haha.
Cool or whattt. I feel so hot. Nyahaha.
And and and and and the best part is? Exams are tomorrow seh!
Baik or whattt. Tu la diyana. Stress with unecessary things then now see la what happen! Haiyeer.

Anyways, i've been studying and thank god PCA ACTUALLY STUCKS IN MY HEAD FOR ONCE! Haha. Its always bio bio bio. For once, PCA! YAY! Improvement made by nur diyana syahirah bte rosli. Haha.
( I don't know what to say actually )

OH! I watched slumdog millionare yesterday morning when i just woke up. Haha. Its a very sad sad story but a very inspiring one. Yeah. I rate it 4.5/5. Seriously. You guys must watch it. Must not give it a miss. Like really. WATCH IT LA!
Haha. I'm over reacting cause why? I'm feeling down right now.
I read something at someone's page and it makes me sad. And i saw the comments on that page and it makes me sad. I just wish now i never have read it.
Cause why? Its stuck in my head now.
&I don't want to have doubts. If it is, it is. If it isn't, then, god bless my soul :)

" The sun in your eyes.
Makes some of the lies worth believing. "
You know what the consequences are.
I ain't going to repeat it.
♥

Alright. This is the fifth time in a row i'm watching the game plan. Haha. Its a cute movie kan kan kan? Lol :D
Payten very cute. I like her hair. Damn curly i tell you. Walauwei. Haha.
If my hair like that. I tak nak seh rebond. Keep it that way.
Only my kakak sedare has that kind of NATURAL hair. I'm bloody jealous you know.
Cause its real real real niceeee! Argh!

Ok da.
Defination of diabetes mellitus is a disorder of glucose regulation characterized by abonormal metabolism of carbohydrates, fats and proteins.
:) SEE! I REMEMBERED! HAHA!

*Edited.
So i just got back home from angmokio. Haha. I had dinner there then walk-walk for awhile then back home. Atiqah called me up and she told me about the leads on who might stole our stuff and all. Haha. She very fierce know, until want to hantar barang-barang all. Haha. SENGET BETOL. Ok. Urm, currently getting pissed off with my usb reader. Nasai. Giving me problems only. Haha.
Ps; I'm still sick :( Can anyone help me to get better?

Goodbye/}

EVERYTIME WE SAY GOODBYE,
I wish we had one more kiss.

Labels: cousin, exams, fever

JR0801E, ♥

Hello people. Yes, i'm back :)

School.

Yesterday was officially the last day of school for us year twos'. Pity em' year ones. They have to come back to school. Haha. So sad XD Anyways, yesterday was the last day that Mr Nah officially last teach us. I'm very sad that he's not taking our class again for 2.2. He has been the best class advisor of all. Here's a little dedication to him.
Mr John Nah, if you read this, i want you to know that you have been the best listener that i can have. You give the best advices any teachers can ever give to me. You give me the strength and hope to carry on in things i never thought i could. You always provide the best for us, the class. We appreciate you from the bottom of our hearts. Thank you for putting up with our nonsense, anger, shoutings and so on. Thank you for giving the best tips to us in our studies. Thank you for everything :)
We wish you all the best for your future as a senior staff nurse in hougang polyclinic. Hope that you will lead a happy life there with stress-free from noisy students. Haha. Thank you once again for everything. You have been the best.
Take care! God bless.
Make sure you come for our class chalet! Haha.
&I thank miss ju also for teaching our class. " Lawar lah cher you today. " HAHA :D
Studies wise, i'm coping very well with bioscience. Just a little bit of struggle in PCA. But i'm trying my very best to do well in PCA. I want to make Mr Nah proud. That will be my farewell gift to him. &Cher, thank you for the pen torchlight and testimonial. Hee.

Friends.

Some friends change. Some friends don't. Some already get the hint that i'm not into them. Which is good. It gives them time to think and actually change themselves. Cause i really cannot tahan with your perangai. I'm tired. I'm just tired to put on a fake show just to make you happy. I'm tired of all these!
To R: Its not that i hate you, i just don't like your attitude cause its irritating. Thats why. I just want you to be less irritating. Thats all. You know we have been close, but i just can't stand your irritatingness. I admit i am too matured to uphold with this kind of attitude, but i'm sorry i just can't.
To S: Whats this about you being jealous i'm close with a certain someone and that certain someone whom you are close with is not close with you now? We are bestfriends. But why are you acting like this? I can't hide anymore. I cannot pretend i'm ok with it. I don't want me to be the problem of these again rising in between the both of you.
To D: I heard things about you that includes me. I cannot take it. If you don't like me to be close with your friends, you just let me know and hell i'll just back off. I don't want you to put on a act. I'm tired. Ok. Just tired with two-faces.
To K: I need you to be frank with her and me. Nomore keeping things in the dark. Thats all i'm asking.
To S&A: I thank the both if you for being there for me always. ♥
To A: My goodfriend, thank you to you too. You always have been there for me to cheer me up. ♥
To U: I ♥ You :) Stay happy ok? I'm still here.
Thats all.

Relationship.

Things have been well for the both of us. Yesyes. Haha. Just celebrated our 10th monthsary. Ahh, i love the gift he gave me :) And i know he loves the gift i get him more then he loves me. Pffft! Haha. But still. I love him. Yeah.
" We bend but we never break.
We fight but we give in. "
I lovelovelovelove youuuuu!
And i know you love me too :)
&Thank you for today, i really enjoyed the times spent today.
And i want you to be happy always ok. And please take care of your health.
I want you to take your health seriously. You know i cannot afford you to be sick. Cause if you are and i am too, nobody can take care of you and me.
Ok bi? I ♥ you.
More then you do. As always :))))

Others.

Nothing else already. Haha. Tv shows are getting boring each day. Arghh. I want to watch slumdog millionaire. Yeah. Thank god i have the dvd. Hehehe.
Ok. Gonna study now.
Lovelove, yes, kimberly ann chanders trademark.
Haha.

Goodbye/}

SO SAD SO SAD,
Its a sad sad situation.

Labels: 10th, sorry

Through thick and thin, i shall stick w you.
Nur sakinah bte jaffar, :)

Ok. Well, i just got back from th hospital. Arghh. Rushing day today. Haha.

School.

School's alright. Been quite busy w revision and all. Exams is just next week! Haha. All th best t my fellow friends. People from JR0801A/B/C/D/E/F/G & H.
Strive for th best. Aim for a good GPA. Get this thing done and over w!
Haha. I know you guys can do it :)
&OH! I know teachers read our blogs and all. So imma do this in a close passage way lah eh. Haha. So, fill in th blanks.
Ps; blanks are all negative comments. Not POSITIVE.

One day, there was this _____ who is not happy w me. She keep on staring at me. Like she's some _____ like that. Wahh. I don't like people t stare at me for no reason. As though i owe their mother nasi lemak or her kidney like that. So, i went t confront this _____, wahh, talk t her nicely, she talk t me like some ______. Peh sot. I keep my cool. ______________ katekan. Hahaha! So then right, this _______, talks about _______. It got me fired up. Seriously. _______ making up nonsense about things that i don't think ________ will say. SUCH _______ KAN?! HAHA! She thinks i was just born yesterday. Tsktsk. So, this _______ and i went t confront _______. Mak dier betol. Haha. SPEWING NONSENSE FROM HER MOUTH! EEE! MINTAK KENE CUCI PAKAI CHLOHEXIDIN SEH! __________! Then get too _______ then _______! Mepek sia! _______ too th max! Haha. Funny thing is, the next day when th _______ came back t school, WAH! PANDAI ACT DEPAN _______! Nak make dier feel guilty kepe ______? Tak dapat lah eh. Now we know how _______ you can get. ______! ______ _______! __________________________! HAHA :D
The end :)
(Sape-sape terase, tu kau peh pasal. Aku tak suruh kau terase pun eh)

Friends.

They have been good. I love my friends.
They are part of my life. They also play a huge role in my life.
True friends help you when you're in need. True friends help you when you're in trouble.
Not paitao on each other. Hahahah :D
I love my friends.
Hehe.

Relationship.

Been through many down moments lately. And this particular incident really made my heart stop beating. Yes, it was a silly mistake made. But the consequences is too deep. Too deep for me t carry th pain alone. Because of what i've been keeping, i suddenly develop something and got rushed t th a&e. I don't want this pain t carry on.
I'm putting my full trust back on you. Its a matter on how you're gonna bring it up or make it stay th way it is. I have enough of getting like this again.
You know how much you mean t me.
You know how much i need you.
Regarding your post, you're never too demanding.
You're just being th best boyfriend for me.
I love you w all my heart and soul.
I know you won't repeat this same mistake again.
Cause if you do. You yourself know what th consequences are.

Others.

I'm trying my best t get away from this hectic life. I need a break from all these.
I need t scream/cry/ventilate/scold/punch/break something.
I need t release whats inside of me.
Th more its affecting me.
But still, its life.
HAHA :D
But really oi, tell me a way t vent out my anger. I really need it. This part totally not joking.
Thats all.

Goodbye/}

EVEN TH BEST FALL DOWN SOMETIMES,
Even th wrong words seem t rhyme.

Labels: hurt, misery., pain